HERE IT IS: The Final Cheat Sheet (not the last cheat sheet, implying ones previous: rather, the cheat sheet for the final. Capice?)

Reminder:

The final is set for April 20th, from 9:00 until 12:00, in room CE-261 (that's the big classroom in the corridor off of the Great Hall). I have two other times available, both on the 10th: 9:00 until 12:00, and 2:00 until 5:00. You must let me know by April 9th if you want to write in one of these time periods.

Follow this link to a pdf of a cheat sheet: it explains the format and gives you guidelines for how to study, but (oh, how can I reiterate this enough) it is not a substitute for regular attendance and doing the readings.

And here's even more basic guidelines:

• write in pen (blue or black) if possible: I don't read things you cross out, so you don't need to erase anything, so you don't need pencil, so there;
• double space, unless your writing is particularly neat: I will do something good for the environment later to compensate, I promise;
• bring extra pens;
• bring cough suppressants that aren't in crinkly packaging;
• bring a bottle of water;
• be on time;
• pee beforehand.

As a general rule, people can be late, but no one is allowed in after the first person leaves.

Lastly, you may bring a translation dictionary, but you should remember that for definition questions you are expected to provide an explanation of how a folklorist uses the term. (That is to say, they will help for the essay component, but not really for the short answer component.)

Material Culture is alive and well and living in Pleasant Bay

Pleasant Bay, Katie Grist, March 2007

Revised date for final asignment

Because I am so awesome, and although you do not deserve me, I have extended the deadline for the final assignment to absolutely, positively, without a doubt, crossing the line of death should it be violated, categorically, unquestionably, definitely, poke a needle in my eye should I lie, NO LATER than Midnight, Atlantic Standard Time, April 10th, 2007. There is a heapin' mess of you little ingrates this year, and I need time to plow though them all.

Those of you who submit later will be confined to the fiery pits of hell.

• Printers can not have run out of toner...
• Disks/jump drives can not be 'I dunno, something just happened'-ed...
• People cannot not be available for interviews...
• Stores can not be out of paper...
• Ankles can not be twisted...
• Grandparents can not die...

And so forth.

As always, there are three acceptable delivery methods:

1. Putting it right in my hot little hands
2. E-mailing it to me as an attachment (in something sensible like Microsoft Word or WordPerfect, preferably not Works or something crappy like that, and definitely nothing bizarro other-world like WordStar or PageMaker)
3. Slipping it under my door in a large envelope

You are all grown-ups, so I won't insult you by telling you to make sure your name is on it. but you know i want to

This is it: the final question of the week

... and oh what a question it be!

Give me a short question for the final exam. And give me the answer to it.

While not every question will be used, you may be able to give yourself a leg up with a question that (a) is based on readings and/or class discussions, (b) is challenging enough that it isn't a freebie, and (c) is easy enough that it doesn't require a photographic memory to answer it.

Not that I'm whining, but it is rather difficult setting an examination, and short answer questions are more difficult to write than the questions for essays, both because they are specific and because you have to think of so many of them. The general effect I am looking for is that, when you first pick up the exam paper and read each question, you should say to yourself "Right, I should know this." It falls between "This question is an insult to my intelligence," and "Who does he think I am, Alan Dundes?" (Note: When you have studied, you will find this joke frickin' hilarious.)

And, lest you think me soft, I won't post your responses to the blog until after the exam.

Life's Rich Pageant, Green, Monster, nothing compared to DOCUMENT (-ing intangible cultural heritage)

Two things to note about this week's QOW's (gosh, a vernacular has emerged):

1. Difficult to keep them as anonymous as other ones, once the presentations start.
2. Lots o' lazy, non-question-of-the-week-answerin' slackers around at the end of the semester.

* sniff * disappointed

With the topic of my project (Toronto Maple Leafs & Leafs Nation) the method I used for documetation in a perfect world was on the lower end of the scale. But since we live in reality and not fantasy my method was absolutely perfect, for the sole reason that I was able to conduct an interview via MSN Messenger,where if I wanted to do anything else I’d have to pretty much travel to Toronto.

Write the project down, and print it on the paper, then document it by paper. Besides, in my project there will be an interview, it can be record on the tape. But both me and the interviewee are not an English speaking people, thus there are might be some pronunciation mistake or problem, because of that, transcript some of the important parts is necessary.

For my project of the semester I have decided to document my information through quantitative research. Considering that I am dealing with the women’s basketball team of CBU I have found it really helpful to document information through interviews but also even in observing their behaviour through video tapings of practice and even their social lives. Needless to say there are many really useful methods of documenting the information I have derived but video taping seems to be the best choice because there is so much more that can be captured on tape and essentially I don’t have to remember as much information in my head. I have it all in front of me.

For my paper, I think that the best form of documentation would be a bibliography including all the sources I have cited for my paper. I haven’t decided yet, but I think it will be done In MLA format. I don’t like using footnotes so they won’t be used at all, so they won’t be included.

One, two, three. I got it!! The answer to this weeks question goes like this.The project that I am doing is How the Japenese Culture truly differs from ours as Canadians. I went in depth on an interview with the wonderful person that I am doing my project on; this wonderful person is Chisato. She is oringally from Japan and came to Cape Breton to study, she love sit here. I had the great honor to being able to meet her in the beginning of 2006 and this is first and foremost the reason why I chose to do my project on her culture. I have to say that I find interviewing is the greatest perception when doing a project on something or someone to get their views on what they have to say for them to express their information and for you to learn. In other words learning new ideas while communicating with the person who you are focusing your project upon. If I had another chose to choose from I would do the ethnography. This would following the person(s) around and taking in details from them by writing down the time and place minute by minute when changes are made.Above all; I would have to say that interviewing is not only the most interesting but I find it gives the most detailed information for whenever you need to do a research paper on a topic that “tickles your fancy”!!

I think that the best methods for documenting my activity would either be an interview or an ethnography. I think with these methods, it allows me to obtain alot more information than something like photography. I even think that just doing the interview would provide me with more information than the ethnography. It would allow me to have more things to talk about in my paper.

As you probably know from my past paper proposal, I chose to do the“Aging Gracefully Group.” This group is something that my grandmother is inalong with other aging woman. I think the best way to document my project isby using other books to back my project up. Other books like things on“woman’s groups” or books on woman aging could benefit me and help with theprocess of backing my paper up. Books are very good for documentationbecause it can help you and other develop an understanding on what myproject is about. Another way of documentation that I plan to use is andinterview with my grandmother. Being in the group that I am doing theproject on, she can be the primary source on understanding what the group isabout in general. Asking her questions about my paper will also benefit mebecause it can help me explain her folk group and makes everything that Iwrite accurate in a sense.

When considering my project I would say the best method for documenting information about the groups activity would be to ask questions in an interview style and record the answers. Since the group I am focusing on is more of an organiztion it would be useful to speak with a member and get their insight on how the organization operates and in what ways the members interact with one and other.

The best method to document the activity covered by my topic was an interview as well as some visual observations. Since my topic was the Toronto Maple Leafs fan group, it seemed appropriate to question two members of my acquaintance that are a large part of this group. While I asked these questions I made visual observations as to what the surroundings offered and if this, in fact, contributed to the topic.

The best methods for my Polish Dancing project would be a Ethnography and a Photography. I picked these methods because in an Ethnography, you write down every little detail and everything that you see or think that its important to put down. When I went to the Polish Valentines Dance at the Polish hall, I did that exact thing. I noticed everything around me, what they were wearing, how people were talking, the food, colors, music etc... Photography is also a very good method to use especially when you take pictures of the different costumes and dances Polish dancers do and wear. So Polish dancing its self is easier to document by these 2 methods.

The method that would be best for documenting my particular group (activity)of focus would be to attend one of the activities and observe people doingstuff at said activity.

Given the fact that my project is on the informal book club my mother runs, the best course for documenting my project would be through observation and interviews. Since the members of the "club" are all in my family and the meetings usually take place at home it is easy to contact the members to ask them questions and even to sit in on a meeting if I wanted to.

Shin-dig @ casa del culture, CBU

For those who don't find hanging out with people like me awkward enough wait until there's dancing in the background.

umm.. yeah. This Friday, in the new culture wing of the big sexy building (the one in all the brochures), there's some kind of cultural event. I don't mean 'some kind' to indicate that I don't know what is happening: rather, 'some kind' as in 'some kind of wonderful' or something like that. It's a particular kind of culture. Whatever floats your boat. I'll be there making strained conversation.

Shenaniganism: dates changing on posts

You may know better, but today I have gone through the blog and changed the dates of postings to reflect the 'actual' date the question of the week was given in class and the 'actual date' (i.e. what would have been the following Tuesday) of the responses.

I have also added (finally) the answers to questions five through eight.

Penultimate question of the week

Oh, the crest of the semester is upon us! Giddy?!?!?

Considering your project, what is (or was, or would be) the best method(s) for documenting your particular activity of focus?

Capice?

Cause we are living in a material world, and I am a materially-oriented folklore prof (for this week, at least)

Clever folks, these youngsters. From cooking Lebanese food to taking off underpants - sort of the alpha and the omega - we know how to do stuff with stuff. I am concerned that two of our Chinese students know all these breaking and entering techniques, which gets my xenophobic tendencies a-sizzlin': but I know the two of them and they're sweet, so they must want to break into your house to water your plants and feed your pets.

And I've wanted to know exactly how to play a comb since I first read Pippi Longstocking back in the day (as the kids are saying).

One technique I know how to do by informal or observed experience is how make cookies and other baked goods by watching my mother and grandmother when I was younger and learning from their examples and what they explained to me.

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I have to say the single greatest invention I ever learned how to make was the paper airplane. While bland and underappreciated by some, this (was then) state-of-the-art piece of work was my single greatest pass time in class from the grades 1-6. I learned this noble skill from my childhood friends, Matt and Justin. I have reconstructed one of their original designs and have now made it more weightless, sleek and a great level more durable; not to mention it's improved airborn time, while being suspended in the air.
I'll bring one in to show you tomorrow. Alright, well that's my assignment.

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Relating to material culture, something that I have learned how to "make" is my bed. I learned this from my mother. This is a technique that my mother taught me and my sister's how to do. I dont remember if she actually taught us how to make our beds or if we learned how to do it from watching her do it.

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i am going to talk about the technology about how to find laser line in the dark, which i was learned from the Movie about steeling money from Bank saver.
We need one glass of red wine. If We look through the glass of red wine, we can find the laser line.
you can to dodge the security system of bank, then take the money.
good luck!

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My story is about the Pin Pang Balls when we were playing we are the kids.
I remembered that we 6 fellows always played Pin Pang together. At that time, we only have few Pin Pang balls, and that was always flat, because of we played hard or kicked the ball by mistake.
One day we used all the balls we had at that time. And we did not want to go home. We were looking at all the flat Pin Pang balls. Suddenly , one fellow came out one idea.
He put the flat ball in his drinking glass, filling with boiling water. The ball returned to round. So we can play again.
That is what I learned at that time. Not from the book, only from him, my Pin Pang buddy.

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Something I know how to make that I have learned through observation is a Lebanese food called a Flatia, which is a type of meat turn over. I have watched my Great Aunt as well as my Grand Parents and Parents make this food using certain techniques that I have come to master. The dough must be flattened into a circle followed by filling the dough with meat and finally pinching the sides together to make a triangle, then cooked in the oven. The method of making the Flatias has always been used in my family and has been learned by younger generations by observation and informal instruction.

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Although I am not musical, this is one of the instruments that I was shown how to make as a child that I used to love to play. It doesn't even matter if the tune doesn't carry, the sound is fun! It is a comb kazoo.
It requires two items:
a comb, similar to ones that guys used to carry around in their back pocket--maybe some still do.
a piece of wax paper (of a size that can be folded in half over the comb)
Fold the piece of wax paper around the prongs of the comb, then place your mouth on the paper and blow/hum. The vibrations will make the kazoo sound. The teeth of the comb are fine and close spaced on one end and thicker and wider spaced on the other so you end up with a range of sounds.

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For this week’s question, we are asked to tell something that we know how to make from past material instruction. Well for this question, I will explain how everyone used to learn how to make those mini volcanoes that everyone used to make in science class. It was very popular to make for science fairs when I was a little kid and eventually they were banned from the fairs because too many people used to make them.
First off, you would make the outer part of the volcano, which can be made by taking a piece of cardboard and making it into the shape of a volcano. Next you would make paper mache, which consists of taking strips of newspaper and dipping them into the paste (which is made usually with water, glue and flour) and sticking them around the cardboard until its fully covering the volcano. You wait until its try and then you paint the volcano into its volcano type color.
Finally, you simply put a cylinder shaped object and place it in the inside of the volcano for the eruption part of the volcano. Once this is done, you can plan the eruption process. This occurs when you mix vinegar and baking soda because it creates a “chemical reaction” and results in a fizzing sensation. You may want to add food coloring to make it more realistic.

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In junior high and late elementary there was a big "note folding" phase. Everyone was writing notes to their friends and it was always a challenge to see who knew how to fold that papers in the best complicated shapes. Folding the notes was like making a fancy envelope out of the note itself and making it no larger than a square-ish shape that would fit in the palm of your hand.

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When I was a child and just learning how to tie my shoes, my mom taught me the technique that a lot of people still use today; the bunny ears. I would watch her step by step, try it after her, if I couldn't do it, she would show me again until I got it. So because of this, I will always know how to tie a bow or even just make a not.

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I have the ability to "do" or "make" many interesting things. The short list includes Ritz dip, peanut butter crunchy fudge ice cream and taking my boxers off without removing my pants. As for the dip - I cannot reveal the ingredients, but I assure you it is quite tasty. The ice cream on the other hand is a recipe I am willing to reveal. First you must take 4 scoops of vanilla ice cream and put it in a blender. Then take 5 tablespoons of peanut butter, I prefer Skippy.Blend the two together until thoroughly mixed. Then take the chocolate stuff that gets hard when you put it on ice cream and pour about 1/8 of a cup in while blending.(blender must be on while pouring it in for optimal results). Put the mixture in a bowl just big enough to accommodate the concoction and place in the freezer to be eaten the next day. You have to wait, but it is so worth it in the end.
As for the boxer thing - I learned it from my idol - the one and only, Mr. Bean. If you decide to try it at home I suggest you start with shorts and work your way up to pants. Otherwise you may seriously injure the bits and pieces.

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Since, I came to the Canada, I keep learning lots of cooking stuff. I did not know how to cook when I was living with my parents, but, after I studied alone in Canada, I have to learn how to live well myself. Therefore, I learned everything, not just cooking, such as laundry, driving, cleaning the room and so on. Most of time, they are just some little tiny stuff, but they still can bother you. In fact, whenever you start getting into them, you will find out how easily they will be. That is my experiences.

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I know how to make a hemp necklace. I learned it from my brother. He used to sit in his room and work on them for hours. I always wondered what he was doing so one time I gave it a try and eventually got the hang of it. It’s pretty tricky when your trying to add the beads in, but I got it!

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An object I know how to ‘make’ based on informal experience would be “cats cradle”. This where you use string around your hands to make different type puzzles that someone else has to solve while moving the string onto their own hands. Of course this is a very loose definition of how its done, but it’s very hard how to describe without observing or experiencing it. I was shown by one of my sister’s friends while out on a camping trip with the school. We were the only two awake on the bus trip out to the campsite so she decided to teach me something that would keep us both distracted for the remainder of the trek. I have been taught a number of ways to do this, or make different shapes using the same “cats cradle’ technique. I even taught a little girl that I once baby-sat how to do this so her and her sister had something to show to her class for show and tell that started with a ‘c’.

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I learned the way to folding laundries by observing from my mom doing. I actually don’t remember when and how I learned.
I also learned the way to do something more quickly as possible. For example, when I was working as a part-time job, I have to do job as quickly as possible. My senior sometimes told me the way to do faster, but most of them I learned by myself by observing the way seniors doing. It was important to work at my part-time job.
I learned how to cook or how to cut for cooking. It is both from my mom and my friends and also from TV.
I also learned how to play the piano through my piano teacher by observing. They taught me how to play the piano not only observing but also saying how to make sounds better.
One more thing that I can think of is the way to wrapping some present with paper for gift. I always observe carefully the cashier is wrapping for the gift. And then I do the same way by myself when I wrap something for my friend or something like that.
There are many things that I learned from observing.

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My friends and I would always make friendship bracelets. I don’t know who taught us but we just picked it up as we went along. One friend would teach the other. We would create new ways to knot the strings and new combinations of colours and weaves. To make a bracelet all that is needed is a couple pieces of string and a set of hands. All you have to do is braid, knot, and weave the different colours of string together. When completed give to a friend or keep it for yourself.

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How to open a locked door, I learned it when I been to Canada.
There are always some problems of my lock when I am in Canada. Sometimes, I might lock the key in the room, or the door locked itself or by someone. Or some of my friends do the same things. But when I was in Toronto, one of my friends taught me how to unlock the door. He used a firm card, such as the membership card, student card, library card, don’t use the telephone card even we have a lot of used phone card because they are too soft. Put the card in between the door and the wall which is the small line that can just fit the card. Then push the card, the door would unlock. It works on many doors in Canada. And I saw some of my friends really unlock by this way. And I tried a few times, but it broke all my cards that used to break in…

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An example that came to mind when I read this question was how I learned how to make home made Christmas tree ornaments. I caught on from watching my mom make crafts every year and my creativity took over from there. It was kind of a tradition when my siblings and I were younger to make a tree ornament every year. We would take 2 pine cones and paint them white so they would look like two snowballs. We would then glue them together to make the body. We also cut out different shapes with felt ( nose, eyes, scarf ) and got a little messy with the glue to finally reach the finished product. The hardest part was trying to tie a knot with the string to hang the ornament on the tree. When I was younger I had help from my parents but finally this year I figured it out. (just kidding) Even now I still get craft ideas from my mom and make my own. It has become a pretty fun past time.
One thing I learned how to make through observation is the perfectly roasted marshmallow over a campfire. I learned this while as a kid at camp over the summer. We would go sometimes and sleep in tents rather than in cabins as we usually did. On these nights we would have the luxury if you will of having a nice campfire and of course with a campfire must come marshmallows. So, in watching other people I learned what caused marshmallows to go up in flames, while others hardly looked cooked at all. It was in holding the stick just far enough away from the flames that the marshmallow was exposed to the heat and yet not close enough to be set ablaze. It made for the perfect golden-like delicious marshmallow and yummy it was!!!

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I could not think of something I learned to make though informal training, but I did think of something I learned to do through informal observation. I learned by watching my dad and my grandfather how to fish, the best place to look for worms and how to clean what I catch.
My dad took me fishing as soon as I was old enough not to fall in. I learned how to cast and how to tie and bait the hook. But I learned from watching him where to look for fish, were the sweet spots are and the tricks to reeling them in once you set the hook.
Grampie showed me how to fish the brooks and streams and how to ice fish. He showed me the right kind of cat food to use to catch trout through the ice, the right way to cut a hole, and I think most important were the lessons on how to get out if I fell in. I learned a lot on those trips, he showed me how to identify animal tracks, what grows where, all kinds of things found in nature. I learned a lot just by listening to him while we walked.
I learned when I got older how to fly fish from my dad. That is my favourite style of fishing. I had to learn a lot on my own, because fly fishing is all about finding a rhythm and it isn’t always something you can teach. Again, he and my grandfather taught me how to tie a fly, (I am really not patient enough to do it all the time) and how to read the river and where the good pools are.
Over the years I have modified my techniques and discovered my own baits and tricks for catching the big one. I have yet to land anything on my fly rod, but three years ago I caught a 19inch trout on my casting rod, my dad still talks about it.

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One thing I remember learning to make was homemade play dough. My mom and I used to always make it whenever I couldn’t find anything to play with. It was just made using just basic kitchen items; flour, water, food coloring, etc. Homemade play dough was the only thing that came to my mind when I heard this question.

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After reading this weeks question a couple of times. I remember a so called “technique” that was done a numerous amount of times by mostly females but sometimes males would take part too. This technique is known as the “bunny rabbit”. It is done with any pair of 5 slim finger gloves; you take the middle finger of one and turn it inside out, next making sure that you leave one glove on the hand when doing this the middle finger that was just folded in is connected to the glove that is on the opposite hand. Next, the rest of the fingers are folded through the rest of the hand and then turned inside out. Finally, the “ears” are pulled through, the ears are the second and third finger.
TADA!! You have made a bunny rabbit. I don’t see many young males or females doing this anymore as I think that this technique has become “out of style now”

Mail is down - sign-up sheet on door

Although it's not an excuse for not updating faithfully, you should all be aware that the university's mail server has gone kablooey, so I haven;t had an email in three days. You may have been sent messages about "undeliverable": but like every girlfriend ever told me, it's not you, it's me.

Also, for those CONSPICUOUSLY absent today, there was a sign-up sheet passed around for presentations. It's on my door (CE-263C) and will be brought to class. But heads up: the last day is all dibbed so, you snooze you lose, early bird gets the worm, first come first served, colder than a witch's naughty bits, and so forth.

And look what I just came across: Martin Sexton, "Women and Wine," from his album In the Journey.

Material Culture - Question of the week

Okay: after struggling with how to phrase it, this is a good take on the question:

Identify something you know how to "make" (i.e. a technique for creating, modifying, adapting an object) that you learned through observation or informal instruction.

"Cootie-catchers," "nit-pickers," "fortune-tellers" - whatever name they go by - are perhaps the golden example: it is unlikely (in North America) that you learned them from school, like from a teacher or in the classroom. More likely, you learned them from peers.

Edit: the loser metacafe.com plug-in with a neat video started acting up

Other examples could include how to fold a fitted sheet, how to change a bra under an item of clothing, how to stack logs in a fireplace, how to make a dumpling: anything that involves stuff.

Wise men say "Only fools rush in," but I can't help asking my students about instances of proverbial lore in their experience

My students are wise, sage, sapient, etc. Certainly inasmuch as they have proverbs up the ying yang. I am pleased how some of the more metaphorical proverbs still apply literally ("let sleeping dogs lie" is a handy reference for dog breeders/animal resuce shelters, as well as contributing a more elusive sagacity.

An example I forgot to mention in class: did anyone see Children of Men, the Clive Owen film? Dis anyone stay through the closing credits? Did anyone listen to the lyrics of the closing song? Jarvis Cocker (ex of Pulp) has this awesome song called "Running the World." He includes two proverbial expressions, each of which contradicts the other (like "he who hesitiates" / "look before you leap"). Can you spot it?

Well did you hear, there’s a natural order.
Those most deserving will end up with the most.
That the cream cannot help but always rise up to the top,
Well I say: Shit floats.

One piece of proverbial wisdom is "fall down nine rimes, get up ten". This means that no matter how many times you fail at something, you should keep trying until you succeed. One can abide by this by always trying their hardest and never giving up no matter how hopeless the odds seem to be.

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I have to admit I chose this particular piece of wisdom because it relates to much of my life. Life at sea (as a seamen and pirate) is also my thesis topic this year so it has a little extra meaning for me.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
I believe this if from an old english proverb and it pertains to life lessons. If your life is smooth and devoid of errors [ smooth sea] you will never learn[ you never become that skilled mariner]. A sailor does not learn his trade by sailing on calm seas. His job is one of apprenticeship, which means he will learn to do his trade by doing the work. Therefore the sailor must experience the turmoil of the sea in order to successfully learn how to do his job; just like people need to make mistakes to help them learn. Our lives would be lacking substance if we did not hit a few rough waves along the way.
I abide by this piece of wisdom by remembering that life can be good but the good doesn't happen over night. Life, like everything worth while, takes time and practice. and when life hits me with one of those rough waves i'm comforted to know I am a strong swimmer.

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For the weekly question, we are suppose to identify a piece of proverbial wisdom that is common do people in general. The statement that I chose is one that I am very familiar with and it has to do with most commonly sports. The statement in which I imply is “To the victor goes the spoils.”
This quote simply means if you are victorious at one thing or another, you will be rewarded in some way. This could mean in a certain competition, or even your own personal goals that could lead you to something good. Spoils means a lot of riches and according to this quote, you can get these riches if you accomplish something great.
I would refer to this quote as all the times I play sports in the past and present. This quote is meaningful every time I play basketball, soccer or tennis. Every time I win something, I shall be recognized and rewarded. This goes for everyone in general who has one a championship or something individually. This quote can be used also as a motivational tool to strive to win something.

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“Look before you leap”
This proverb teaches you to think of the consequences before you act. This is useful to me because I feel it is always important to think before I act so that I do the right thing and it is not something I will regret. Also to think before I speak so I can be understood properly. This is also important to consider when making decisions in that you should weigh all of your options before making the final decision.

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There are a number of pieces of proverbial wisdom that seem to dominate the business world chief among them seems to be:
“It’s a dog eat dog world.” This usually means that the world is ruthlessly competitive and you have to look out for your own interests. In my experience, this particularly applies to the consulting field, in which large consulting firms bid for contracts (usually government) that are worth millions of dollars—each firm is selling essentially the same commodity, people—their skills and services.
It serves as a warning to consultants not to trust each other when it comes to sharing information. It creates an ‘us’ and ‘them’ mentality that polarizes groups of workers, making people distrustful of each other.

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The piece of proverbial wisdom that I would like to express is "Its all part of life's rich pagent". Besides being the namesake of one of my favorite albums, it signifies the 'going on' of our existence. In essence you take the good with the bad. Somethings may be going good for you, others not so much but it is all part of life. I think that it is a good lesson to live your life by. Life isn't always the best but you have to deal with it.

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"When a door closes, a window opens. This means if 1 opportunity ends or doesn't work out, another opportunity becomes available. Example: Julia Roberts thought it was the end of the world for leaving the convent, but really it was the best thing that ever happened to her, in The movie " The Sound Of Music".

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." --Chinese Proverb
This quote is apparently from the Chinese proverb, but it's something my mother has always told me, especially when I complained of doing chores. In the context in which it was told to me, it meant that my mother could continue to do these chores for me, but if I learned to do them for myself I'd be much better off. So even though I would rather be lazy most of the time and have my mother or someone else pick up after me, I try to do and learn different things for myself in hopes that it will pay off in the future.

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A piece of proverbial which I think we all try to live by is the Japanese proverb "Fall seven times, stand up eight". This means that you have to try again after a failed attempt and to never back down. It includes standing up for what you believe in. Personally, I try to follow it by simply keep on keepin' on. If I try something and fail then I merely dust myself off, get in the right mindset and make another attempt. If you just try something once, you aren't really trying at all.

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An example of a piece of proverbial wisdom would be " Live and Learn". This proverb is just describing how the only way to learn from your mistakes is by making them and learning for future so that you will not make the same mistakes twice. This is a proverb that I usually follow. I think that it is so true what the only way to live is by making mistakes and learning from those mistakes!!

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That is a interesting topic. I heard lots of proverb in English. I think proverbs are a sapiential representative. For example “a burnt child dreads the fire.” there is the same mean in Chinese. It is the “someone was bit by snake, someone dreads the rope.”
If you do not study hard when young you'll end up bewailing your failures as you grow up.
If a son is uneducated, his dad is to blame.
If you have never done anything evil, you should not be worrying about devils to knock at your door.
Kill one to warn a hundred.
Lift a stone only to drop on your own feet.
No wind, no waves.
Those are some of the proverbs in China

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A candle lights others and consumes itself.
It is mean: a candle is burning itself and bringing the lights to us until it burned itself out. It tells us one important thing that is a self-devotion spirit. In our life, there have many people who are dedicating themselves to their work like teachers. As a teacher, he is spending a lot of time on teaching his students and giving the knowledge and experience for us.

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I remember when I was younger my grandmother would use different sayings to teach us about the ‘important’ qualities of life. I remember hearing one in particular more than once. It wasn’t until I was a bit older that I learned that most of what she used to teach us was old proverbs. The one I remember most is an old Irish proverb, “If you dig a grave for others, you might fall into it yourself.” When I was younger this proverb used to creep me out a little. So to make it a little less creepy I always thought of it instead as, don’t do something for others unless you’re prepared of the consequences of your actions. Because this is what I thought when hearing this proverb, this is also what I would use to describe what it means. I always try and think of what my actions may lead to before I do something but I have found that time doesn’t always allow for that. So no I can’t say I always abide by it, though I do try to.

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“Everyone wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die”
This means that people want good things to happen to them, but they don’t want to do the work to get there. If you want to go to heaven, the sacrifice is you will have to die. However, not all people are looking forward to death. For instance, if I wanted to lose 20 lbs; I would have to exercise and do the work to help me lose the weight. Yet no one wants to exercise to lose the weight, they just want it gone. I avail myself of this because it gives you a reality check on how things really are. I believe this statement is true. It kind of makes me think twice on how you have to put the effort into something if you really want it to happen.

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“Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your gonna get”- Forrest Gump. This basically means that during life you never know whats going to happen, you have an idea what to expect, but everything is random so you never fully know. This proverb never made sense to me for years, probably because I was like 10 when I first saw the movie. I thought of this proverb, proabably because its so well known, but its actually really relevant to everyone’s life. You never know how things are going to turn out or even what’s going to happen next.

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“Let sleeping dogs lie” and “the chickens always come home to roost” are two proverbs that come to mind. In the first example, people generally know what happens when you disturb the dog, the proverb suggests you should just leave well enough alone.
My personal experience with this plays out at least once a week. Hoontitten torments my husky Misty, she rubs up against her, tickles her nose and ears with her whiskers, walks on her, is just generally insulting to the dog. This is fine with Misty, unless Titten decides to do this while Misty is sleeping, then look out. She wakes up and the war is on, she snarls and tries to grab the cat, the cat then promptly boxes Misty’s nose and order is quickly restored. But it is a different dog that wakes up and goes after the cat, and Titten is lucky Misty is good natured otherwise it would end very badly for the cat.
Personally, I just leave well enough alone.
The second example, any time I heard it meant that you had been doing something to someone, talking about someone and now that has happened to you. Like chickens, who are very reliable in coming home to roost every night. You can be assured that if you are talking behind people’s backs or using them for something, that it will happen to you before you know it.

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Do onto others, as they would do onto you
In other words if you want to be treated a certain way treat your friends and/or family that way so they will treat you the same way back. I along with pretty much everyone in the world use this every day. In an easy example if you want to be respected by someone you must respect them.

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“Don’t count your chicken’s before they hatch”
I’m sure you’ve only heard this one about 1000 times, but in other words this piece of proverbial wisdom means don’t count on something that you don’t really have yet. For example, you are applying for a new job that you think you have a really good chance at getting. You pass in your resume the boss smiles at you and immediately you start planning on what you can spend your first pay check on then your second and maybe third. ( This is when you should be smart and think wait I have no money and I’m still walking on eggshells waiting to see if I got the job or not.) But of course some people jump ahead of themselves and apply for a credit card assuming they will get the job, get paid and be able to pay their debt after maxing out their credit card. This proverb referring to counting chickens before they hatch is the same idea. Assuming you have 12 eggs , some people take it for granted they will have 12 chickens who will make more eggs and make them money. In some cases things may turn out good but what if some of the eggs are bad? What if you don’t get the job? ...could lead you to some problems. This proverbial lesson could definitely relate too a lot of people , unfortunately myself sometimes.

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“Oh my oh my” I shall certainly ponder this weeks question for a brief moment…. Hmmm… Okay the answer to this weeks question for me is “Practice makes perfect” yes this is a general one and well I must say wow… it took me a while to think which would be the best because there are so many to choose from!! “Practice makes perfect” means that if you do something over and over you will gradually get better. An example could be winning a game. You are eventually going to win if you practice of ways to get better and better each time. Another idea is doing a trick on someone the more you practice the better you will get in addition to the harder it will be for your opponent to figure out! So just remember…. Practice and you will be perfect!!!!!!!!

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“An apple a day keeps the doctor away” is an expression used by many people. Easting and apple a day will not necessarily keep the doctor away but eating healthy keeps the doctor away. It means that I you are to eat healthy you will not have to see the doctor as often. Eating healthy results in a healthier living that results in fewer visitations to the doctors.

Question the, what, seventh?

Identify a piece of proverbial wisdom: what does it mean, and how do you avail yourself of it? Here's an example:

The early bird gets the worm.

Ornithological husbandry advice? Nay, methinks a metaphor is implied. Now, come up with your own.

Glooby glooby dweeby, plooby ploopy plee-twee, blah blah blah blow blow: song song song si-ing, sing sing sing song

This one was either poorly phrased as a question (quite possible) or inspring (*ahem* equally possible), because it made so many of you go forth into the world - or at least the internet - and do, heaven forfend! shudder at the thought of it! research. But most of you drew similar conclusions, that you did indeed have songs that somehow became part of your repertoires that, at one point in time, were composed by a particualr person. Vindicated!

A song that I know that I am actually surprised that has been written by someone is ' Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer". I've never thought about who was the origional writer of this song. It was just one that I have learned and have never forgotten how it goes. I looked it up and the song was origionally written by Johnny Marks.
There are alot of songs out there that I dont even know who wrote them!

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A song I sing all the time is "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow." I am not sure who wrote it but it must have been composed by someone. The same goes for "We Are An Island", Cape Breton's "Theme" song. It is a song that I have been exposed to since birth but never really thought of it as being written by someone....it was just there. I did manage to find one web site which made a guess at who the possible writer was for "We Are An Island". Kenzie MacNeil. I am not sure how he came up with that name but it's as good a guess as any.

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As you mentioned, Happy Birthday is the type of song. When I had a birthday party with my roommates and a bunch of friends, all we knew the song and sang together. In Japan, we use the lyrics as same as English version, but the pronunciation is a little different from original one. On the other hand, my Chinese roommate sang the song and the lyrics were totally different, I mean Chinese lyrics. But the song is the same. It was interesting to me.

The other song that I think of is Christmas song, such as We wish a merry Christmas, Silent Night, and so on. I guess it is also common around the world. I think it comes from foreign countries, I mean from the Japanese point of view. People taught me these Christmas songs, such as kindergarten or from my parents. I don’t know who the writers of these songs are, but to sing Christmas song becomes natural for us.

When I went to my friend’s house two weeks ago, we did a board game together. In that game, I have to humming a song, Puff the Magic Dragon. I knew this song, so I hummed. My friends were kind of surprised because I knew the western song. In Japan, we often sing a song from foreign countries. In the music textbook, there are many foreign songs.

Music is amazing. Music can connect people in all over the world.

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When I was little my sister and cousin taught me this song called “Found a Peanut”. They learned the song through some camps that they went to. I knew the song for years and the only place I ever heard it being sung was at different camps. For this question I decided to look it up and see if it was actually written by someone. Though there are many different versions of this little song, it turns out it was in fact written by Stewart Lee and Richard Herring.

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"Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" is one of the world's best-known and most-loved poems. Millions of English-speaking people can recite the first verse from childhood memory, but few know who wrote it. The charming nursery rhyme, often wrongly thought to be a folk story, was composed almost 200 years ago by London-born sisters Jane and Ann Taylor, and was first published in 1806 as "The Star." Perhaps the neglected authors will receive long-overdue credit in 2006.” I didn’t know who actually came up with this song. It is basically known world wide. I was also surprised to find that it was written almost 200 years ago. That’s a long time for such a well-known nursery rhyme.

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There are a number of songs from childhood, either nursery rhymes or campfire songs that we never really thought about someone having written. I did a search on a number of them that I could remember and the results were varied.

My favorite example is a folk poem, sung though, and I cannot find the original author.
It is: There was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly.

Some other examples of songs I couldn't find the original author to are:
Roll Over (There were 10 in the Bed)
The Old Grey Mare She Ain't What She Used to Be
The Mockingbird Song (Poppa's gonna buy you a diamond ring)

But I did finally find one where the author was identified:

From Wikipedia
Row, Row, Row Your Boat" is a nursery rhyme, and a popular children's song/proverb, often sung as a round.
The tune is credited to Eliphalet Oram Lyte in the publication The Franklin Square Song Collection (1881, New York), which also indicates that he adapted the lyric:
Row, row, row your boat,
Gently down the stream.
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,
Life is but a dream.

There are a number of alternate verses listed but I don't remember singing those. I think we made ours up except I do remember singing the following verse listed:
Row, row, row the boat
Gently down the stream
Throw your teachers overboard
And listen to them scream!

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When I was younger I always used to hum the Mexican Hat dance song, I only found out a few years ago that it was an popular song, quite famous in Mexico of all places. I must have heard it from bugs bunny or something, but had no idea it was a real song.

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The song I have chose for this topic is the ever so popular children’s song, “If You’re Happy and You Know It.” This song I have heard over and over while I was in pre-school and my early elementary days. Its one of the most well known songs for everyone around the world because everyone can say that they heard it at least once when they were a child. Some of the lyrics of the song are as stated:
“If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
If you're happy and you know it,
And you really want to show it,
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.”

As the song states when it says, “clap your hands,” we are suppose to as the song says, clap our hands. The next verse usually includes, “stomp your feet” and the next verse will be something else. You can even be creative and think of your own things if you really wanted.

What I did not know about this song was that an actual songwriter hadwritten this. I thought for sure that some kid or something a long time agoand it was passed on made it up. But the real inventor of this song wasAlfred B. Smith, who was born in 1916. He died in 2001.

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http://www.rhymes.org.uk/who_killed_cock_robin.htm
http://www.wtsmith.com/songs/capitalship.html
http://www.kididdles.com/lyrics/n013.html

These links show the words to some of my favourite songs my grandmother sang to me. The songs were “Who Killed Cock Robin”, “Capital Ship” and “One Wide River” which I always called “Noah Built Himself and Ark.” They are all fun songs for kids, “One Wide River” especially is easily adapted to your own words. I learned a verse, “The camel he ate a cinnamon bun, there’s one more river to cross”, which is not included in the versions I found on the internet. I think my version is a little better.

“Capital Ship” does have an author, but I think if you asked people, most people would not know who he is. (Charles Edward Carryl). This one is my favourite, and I still remember some of the words to it, I started singing it to my nephew, mostly because he and the dog are the only ones who tolerate my singing.

I had to ask my grandmother to help me remember the rest of the words, she is able to remember them way better than I can, but we both had to Google the entire songs. She told me she learned them from her father who came from England, she said it was his way to keep the five kids quiet in the car by teaching them to sing these songs.

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I have always known "Ring Around the Rosie" which could be considered a song since I was a child. It never occured to me to think of who wrote it or orginally sang it. However, Im sure everyone probably knows some version of it because I have heard several different versions of it myself.

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One song that I definitely remember hearing a lot of growing up has to be London bridges. It goes, “London bridges falling down, falling down, falling down. London bridges falling down, my fair lady” This also happens to be a song that I have heard so often throughout my 22 year life that I have never once stopped to think that someone had actually written it, except for now of course. I guess the reason I have never really thought about it is because I honestly heard the song on a regular basis for years as a kid. Even now it is pretty crazy to think that someone out there actually sat down and wrote the lyrics to such a song, although of course it makes perfect sense that it’s a written song. For me I guess it’s just been one of those taken for granted type songs where I haven’t thought once about the song really, until now of course!

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The song that I used to sing and listened to for a very long time since I was a child, was "You are my sunshine". When I was a child, I never realized or asked who actually wrote the song? Was it a girl or was it a guy? I had no clue. I thought maybe it would have been just a mother singing to her child one day possibly rocking her baby to sleep or something. When I found out it was a man by the name Jimmie Davis in 1940, I was really surprised. The first time he played it, it became an instant hint. Now it is a very popular song used by all kinds of parents all across the world. It can help children sleep better or just to play and watch a baby smile.

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In my memory there is a song. This is a nursery rhyme. When I was a little boy my parents taught me how to sing this song. In kindergarten my teacher taught too. All children was singing and playing in the playground. In china we named this song “two tiger”. The lyric is that: “two tiger, two tiger, running fast, one is not have eye, the other one is not have tail, so queer, so queer.” This song was so popular in china 10 years ago. Every child knew it and singed it. But before 2 years I knew this song came form French. I am so surprise. Little does one think I have been singing a French song for 10 years? It is interesting.

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I song I used to sing when I was younger at least was "there was an old ladywho swallowed a fly" and I never really realized that it must have beenwritten by someone (or even thought about it). To me it was just some funnysong to sing when there was nothing to do.

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By now we all know that Children’s folklore has a variety of different ways to be looked at. Please let me explain into greater detail. Beginning with children’s song and story. A children’s story such as Robert Munches’ “I love you forever” or Mortimer has certainly been passed down from many years ago or further more a song such as “Skip Skip Skip to my Lou” or “Somewhere over the rainbow” ties in well with both song and repetition.

The song that was very popular for me was “Ms. Mary had a steamboat”. Which goes like this:
Ms. Mary had a steamboat the steamboat had a bell,
Ms. Mary went to heaven, the steamboat went to
“H-E-L-L-O operator, please give me number 9 or I will kick you in
behind the yellow curtain there was a piece of glass
for when Mary sat upon it she hurt her little
ask me no more questions, please tell me no more lies.
The boys are in the bathroom beating up their
flies are in the city the bees are in the park.
Ms. Mary and her boyfriend are kissing in the
D-A-R-K D-A-R-K D-A-R-K dark; the dark is like a movie, the movies like a show.
For this is Ms. Mary and her boyfriend and this is all I know.
I know I know my ma’ I know I know my pa’
I know I know my sister with the 80 meter bra.
I know I know my dog, I know I know my cat,
I know I know my brother who is 60 meters fat.

Just reading the words black and white on a piece of paper you realize that it wasn’t the greatest song that I learned but it’s certainly funny in the long run. In terms of the meaning to the lyrics I believe that it basically had a meaning of a boyfriend and girlfriend breaking up after a fight and making fun of the physical features of the brother and sister.You don’t hear a whole lot of this song being told by to many people now of days but I can remember it unfortunately word for word and asking my friends they can remember just the same!!

As I sit in the Halifax Int’l Airport patiently awaiting my flight home from an amazing reading week one song really jumps at me. That song is Don’t Worry Be Happy. I actually thought it was just written for that annoying Bill Bass toy that was manufactured a few years ago. My grandfather got one for x-mas and I could have killed it. But to my surprise I once went to download it and I found out it was actually composed and sung by the great and legendary Bob Marley.

The first song that came to mind when I thought about this question is the well known traditional song accompanied with a dance called the “Hokey Pokey”. For example:

“You put your left hand in, You put your left hand out,
You put your left hand in and you shake it all about...
You do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around,
and thats what its all about!”.

As you would sing the song you would follow the actions of course and it was a great old time back then. As a child it was a very popular song to be played at birthday parties and even weddings and everyone had their own way of singing it. The song has been played and sung all over the world. In some places the words are slightly changed but it still has the same beat and sound to it. It may have come across as a silly kids song but it has been copyrighted several times in the United States for reasons that I would never had known as a kid or even until I researched it today. A little interesting fact: “In the United States it costs $32 000 for an ad campaign (television and radio for 3 months) to use the "Hokey Pokey". In the United Kingdom the "Hokey Cokey" (although not necessarily the U.S. Hokey Pokey) is regarded as a traditional song and is therefore free of copyright restrictions.”

Speaking of being drunk and singing, I think (although cannot actually guarantee it) that I was singing "The Song That Never Ends" on Saturday night. Wait - I can assure you that I was singing it because I ended up in a heated argument with a friend over the lyrics. She thought it was the song that DOESN'T end. Honestly, who does not know the words to that song. Anyway, I don't know who sings/wrote it, although I do remember that it was on that show with the puppets - Lamb Chops? I just looked it up and it was Lamb Chop's Play along. I also looked up who wrote it and it was a guy called Norman Martin - whoever the hell he is.

Question of the (reading) week

This is a weird one.

Identify a song that you know / sing that you were surprised to find out was actually written by someone.

Let me explain: people have repertoires of songs just like they have repertoires of stories. I know not everyone is a singer, but you all know songs, and you probably sing in a number of contexts, even if none of them is on a stage in front of people. Many of these songs are products of popular culture and their association with their creators and/or most famous performers is still intact. When you get drunk and start singing "Wild Thing" or "Louie Louie," you probably remember that, as ubiquitous as they are, they are most famously associated with The Troggs and The Kingsmen, respectively. Even if you're not sure of the original artist you are probably aware of them as "created." (Anyone remember Shirley Ellis's most famous song? Again, you all know it, despite your immediate desire to exclaim "Who the hell is Shirley Ellis?") This is in part because they bear the hallmarks of popular music.

But there are other songs that you may know that you have had as part of your repertoire for so long that they seem not to have come from an outside source like popular culture but passed down exclusively through informal interaction. A classic example would be "Happy Birthday." I defy you to find an English-speaking North American who can honestly make a claim that they do not know or have never sung that song. Doesn't mean they like it, just that they know it. But "Happy Birthday" was not only written, it's copyrighted. I you have seen a movie where it was performed, watch the closing credits and note that it is listed in the song permissions.

If the question proves too weird, here's a modified version:

Identify a song in your repertoire for which the association to the originating artist is (largely) irrelevant.

My students tell stories. Some of them are nuts

Boy howdy! Some of you know how to spin a yarn. What we have here ventures from anecdotes to goth masterpieces. I have a feeling there are aspiring writers out there: I also have the feeling that there are aspiring barflies. I bid you all well. But read through, and they are all interesting. It's equally neat to see that some stories have titles (i.e. the tellers title them in some sort of metonymic device), while others have stage directions. Some are allegorical (see the 'little frog' story, some are family legend, one explicitly has a moral, and several are surprisingly confessional.

A dull thud sounds as the corpse falls to the ground, it's blood soaking into the parched earth.
No one is there to witness it's last gasping breaths as Death comes to claim her prize.
"Anyone, anyone there?" It gasps weakly, coughing up crimson liquid.
And then, letting go of it's panicked grasp on life, it falls softly into the blind peace of death.
Still, no one appears to give any last respects.
The corpse is left to rot, unnoticed by the rushed world surrounding it.
The body becoming part of the earth once more, as the soul escapes into eternity.
Memories of torture slowly fading into the darkness, never to return.
Everlasting bliss as all worry is washed away into nothingness.
Free...
That is what it is now.
Free of pain, heartache, sorrow, anger, happiness, hate, love.
Free.

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Hey remember when Paul and I used to drive you crazy playing soccer. We used to go out every day one summer and play from dawn to dusk. I know you used to hate it because we would use you as our tackling dummy. We would always play the ball intentionally right to you so that we could practice our slide tackling. You didn’t like it but you have to admit that it toughened you up and improved your skills. At the beginning of the summer you would start crying after one tackle but by the end it would take us two or three tackles before we got you. I remember Paul and I trying to bribe you when you did start crying. We didn’t want to get in trouble so we would fetch you ice cream and chips just so you would not tell on us. We could not hide that one time though. We both tackled you at the same time and you got a gash on your shin. Paul and I tried to patch you up and to your credit you did not tell on us. I guess your white socks slowly turning red gave it away to the parents. You ended up having to get six stitches and Paul and I got in so much trouble. The next day though the three of us were back outside playing again. I love looking back and remembering those times. It turned out to be the last summer we all hung out together. We moved to Canada in August and Paul stayed in Malawi. That is part of growing up though. Since then we have led our own lives. In the past few years I have been off at university and you will soon be moving to England. Maybe one day we will both get to go back to Malawi and meet up with Paul and reminisce, maybe not. Regardless of what happens I will never forget that summer…some of the best slide tackles of my career!!

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Farmer and snack

In a very cold winter there was a farmer. He finished his work and went back home. When he walked through an alley he looked something on the grass. He approximated and looked around. Oh, he found a snake. The snack was cold; it was like a ice-lolly. It was very pathetic. The farmer said: “poor snack, I knew you were very cold. Let me gave you warm.” then put the snake into his clothes and kept walking to home. In the clothes there were warmer. The Snake warm, regained consciousness little by little, the snack was regained its natural instinct and bite its benefactor, the farmer was suffered a fatal injury. He was poisoning. Before dying, a farmer, said: “I never have, I pity villains, we should be evil.”

That story told us we should not pity the bad guy or evil people. Sometime you safe them and they will bite you back.

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A little background before I get to the stories, they are really short, so I opted to tell more than one. Gramps tells the best stories, and I always say I need to write them down, I took this opportunity to do so.

There was an old fella who lived over in George’s River, once a week he walked to North Sydney to go to the bank and get some groceries. Once this day he was walk back and he met the old priest from Boisdale who was walking down the road muttering to himself. The old fella stopped the priest and said “Father what is wrong with you today, it’s not like you to be going around talking to yourself”. The priest said, “some young gaffer stole my bike and I now I can’t get around to do my visiting,” the old fella thought for a second and he said to the priest, “Father, what you need to do is at mass on Sunday you need to preach the Ten Commandments, when you get to ‘Thou Shall Not Steal’ really emphasize that Father, and I am sure the fella who stole your bike will feel guilty and return it.”

The following Sunday the priest gave the sermon, but didn’t seem to emphasize “Thou Shall Not Steal”, so the old guy stopped the priest on the way out of church and said, “Father what happened, why didn’t you stress about the stealing?” The priest said to the old guy, “I was giving the sermon and I got to thou shall not covet thy neighbours wife, and I remembered where I left my bike.”

There was a Boisdale who worked on the train, one day he was walking to work and about half way there he took a “spell” sat down for a few minutes and decided he’d better go home and go to bed for the day. When got home, he took his boots off in the kitchen and walked upstairs, in his bed he found a man with his wife! He was so enraged he took the shot gun and killed them both. He went over to the next door neighbours to tell his friend what had happened, now this friend was famous for saying “well, it could be worse.” If someone said “oh it’s pouring buckets today”, he’d say, “well it could be worse, it could be a nor’easter”, or someone would say, “oh my mother fell and sprained her ankle today,” he’d say, “well it could be worse, she could have broken her hip.”

So the fella who shot his wife is telling this neighbour all about the events of the day. When the story is all done, the neighbour looks at the man and says “well ya know it could be worse,” and the man says, “how the hell could it get any worse? I shot my wife and another man, tell me how can it get any worse?????” and the neighbour says, “could have been worse, if it was yesterday, it would have been me.”

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There is a frog, tiny tiny frog. She grows up by her kind parents in a small village.
As she grew up, she started to think that she wanted to know more about something. And then, she decided to go to elementary school. She learned how to communicate with her friends.

She enjoyed school life, but she is so curious about the outside world from the small village. So, she decided to go university in another city. This was the first time for her to go outside the village. Everything was different from the village. She was overwhelmed a little bit, but she was getting used to its life. It was also first time for her to live alone. She learned many things, such as cooking, washing, cleaning, and especially she started to appreciate her parents.

The curious frog started to think that she wanted to know more and more. She decided to go abroad to study another language. She had no idea how much different from her world. Of course, she had anxiety, but she has already decided to go. It is challenge for her. What is waiting for her? Is it so tough thing or so happy thing? She believe she will be able to know many things from the study abroad.
She goes to the abroad with a lot of hope and dream.

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One day a sister and brother were sitting in the kitchen and there was an ironing board and an iron set up beside them. The older sister thought she would play a trick on her younger brother, so she told him to kiss the little boy that they could see in the reflection on the iron. The little brother, thinking that his sister wouldn't do something mean to him, leaned over and kissed the hot iron. His lips were burnt for a week and his big sister was grounded for even longer!

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It was a mid summers day of 1999 where two kids were playing in the trees. Jordan was hanging upside down from the branches as he jokes with his friend Lila about what it would be like to be a monkey. “Ee ee” Lila responds, “I love acting like a monkey”. They both laugh and swung from branch to branch, imitating monkeys. There was a smell in the air that afternoon; it was as though something was burning. “What is that smell? Its getting stronger.” states Lila. They never paid much attention to the smell after that until they heard sirens. The sirens grew louder and louder when a fire truck came roaring down the street. The kids jumped down from the tree and went running after the flaming red fire truck. The firefighters were fighting the blaze with their hoses and there were planes dropping water from above. The kids were amazed by the firefighters they wanted to see more but the police officers told the children to go back to their house and not to worry about anything. The kids ran home to tell their mom. “Mom! Mom! Do you smell that, the woods are on fire! The police sent us to tell you” Lila exclaimed. The mother did not believe her children but then she sees the smoke. The mother franticly ran around the house looking for things to try to salvage in the case they have to evacuate. She is gathering photos, papers, anything she can think of when there is a knock on the door. “Sorry miss but you are going to have to evacuate as soon as possible for you and your children safety” the Police officer states. The mother is unsure of what to pack away she knows she cannot fit everything in the car. She tells her kids to grab anything that means a lot to them and that they have five minutes. The kids run to their rooms where they grab their teddy bears, blankets, and some clothes. The mother packs up the car with her children in the backseat with their dog, cat, and even their neighbours’ hamster. She drives away scared and thinking this would be the last time she sees her home. The family stayed with their grandmother that night. There was not much sleeping happening that night by the kids or their mother. When they awoke they were unsure if they even had a house to go home to that morning. The mother assured the kids that everything was okay; she got in the car by herself and drove back to her house unsure of what she was going to see. As she turns onto her road she see firefighters in the ashes of the forest and she begins to cry thinking that her house is gone. She approaches her house and there it was standing just as she left it all in one piece. There were firefighters sitting on the roof soaking the house all night to ensure that it would not catch on fire. The mother could not be more grateful; she called her children and exclaimed to them the wonderful job the firefighters did to save their house. The family returned to their house the next night and they were never so happy to be sleeping in their own beds.

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( In the voice of a young girl )

The very first time I ran away I was just a little girl. I was only five fingers old when I ran into the forest for the very first time. I’d put my play clothes on first though so mommy wouldn’t get mad if I got all dirty. I’m six now but I would never leave home without my best friend Ben. I got Ben when I was just a baby, and when I felt scared he would lick my hand to make me feel like everything was okay. I liked his company when I used to hide in the forest but sometimes he’d let his nose get the best of him and we’d find ourselves lost in the darkness of the night. I used to tell him not to get us lost but he didn’t listen much. I guess I should have listened to my mommy too when she told me not to wander farther then the white fence that separated our house from the ‘magical’ forest.

It was me and Ben’s secret though, no one else knew that the forest was magical and all of the fun things that we found there. When I ran away at night time after supper we would see glowing yellow eyes in the trees, I tried to tell mommy once but she said trees don’t have eyes, but I know they do I saw them with my own. Sometimes on our adventures Ben would bark at the squirrels, but they couldn’t talk back because they always had their mouths full. Mommy always told me never to talk with my mouth full, so I guess there mommies did too. I’ll never forget that special night when I was only five, me and Ben saw lots of stars twinkling in the sky and the some stars made the shape of a big spoon, like the ones mommy would let me lick after making a big chocolate cake.

When I’d feel lucky I’d make a wish on one of the brightest stars it was my favorite. Sometimes I’d wish for new toys or candy but most of the times I’d wish for daddy to come back home. Mommy said he’s not comin back though cuz he’s at peace now in a place called heaven, mommy wishes he’d come home too. I think Ben misses daddy too sometimes, he used to take Ben huntin in these woods and Ben used to chase rabbits. He don’t like to chase them anymore though so he usually just sticks with me. I never told mommy about my favorite star for a long time, but when I did she didn’t get mad no more when she’d see me go past the white fence. I think its cuz she knows I liked to go make wishes with Ben in my special place as long as I was home by seven to hug and kiss her goodnight.

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A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

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I’m going to tell you an embarrassing story of when I was younger. So, when I was 12 years old I was very excited going into the school year because I was no longer a child, trapped in the elementary school system but rather an adolescent, entering the wonderful world of junior high. For essentially the entire summer I was anticipating my first day of school. The excitement that I had is beyond anything that I can really describe. In fact that first day of school just may have been the most excitement I remember feeling in my entire life. Anyway, so finally the day arrives and I make it to junior high where my brother was a senior in the graduating class so I felt pretty cool and confident with no sense of fear. After all, if anything were to happen I’d have my brother’s protection because he and his friends “ruled the school!” However, my excitement turned to pure embarrassment when while on break between classes I had to go to the washroom so badly. I had to go pee so bad I practically wet my pants. So, I quickly ran to the nearest washroom, kicked open the door and immediately started undoing my belt buckle before I had even entered the stall when suddenly I looked up and saw a boy washing his hands. For a moment I was completely confused, thinking he had made the mistake when I turned around and realized I was surrounded by a number of males. After hearing a bunch of laughter, I quickly ran out of the washroom where I was met with more laughter and puzzled looks. Extremely embarrassed I finally ran into the proper washroom and peed like I had to do, taking an extra amount of time in the washroom afterward to gather my thoughts and dignity, trying to erase the embarrassment moment from my memory. Clearly, since that was a good ten years ago, the strategy did not work and I am still haunted to this day with that terrible memory.

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This past summer my two sisters, my friend and I drove to Moncton New Brunswick to camp and to go to the Country Rocks the Hill concert. The day of the concert we were all hanging out around the tent and two of Alan Jackson’s film crew came up to us and asked is they could video tape us. They wanted to show what fans do before they go to see Alan Jackson. At the concert during one of the songs, my younger sister’s picture came up in the background of the video. Some of the other performers at the concert were George Canyon, Sugarland and Brooks & Dunn. The concert was absolutely amazing aside from the fact that we got rained out and ended up sleeping in the truck.

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My mom told me a story once when her and my dad had just moved into their home and were doing it over. My grandfather and my father were up in the attic working around the chimney. She said my grandfather had been continually repeating to my father to “Be careful now Barry, you have to step on the beams so you don’t fall through the jip rock” (because the attic didn’t have proper flooring, between each beam and insulation had only been jip rock). My mom said my grandfather must have preached to my dad, saying it almost 5 times. At the time my mom was in her room watching television, and all of a sudden she sees a big leg come pummeling through her ceiling. Scared! She screams; then starts laughing hysterically. She ran up to see if my father was okay. It turns out that it wasn’t my father’s leg through that ceiling, it was my grandfathers. She said she ran downstairs trying to hold in her laugh because my grandfather was after preaching to my dad about not stepping on the jip rock, but she just couldn’t help it. My mom sat there and laughed so hard she started crying. She said my grandfather wasn’t too pleased about it. But after a while he started to laugh at himself. Haha

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A Horse Of Course

One summer for my 7th birthday, my parents took myself and my sister Jillian to P.E.I. on vacation. For the first few days we did all the typical tourist stuff, spent the day at Rainbow valley, Cavendish beach etc... One morning while eating breakfast at the cabins were we were staying, my sister hollered : mommy there's a horse in the kitchen" before my mother could answer , I had run ahead of her and saw a horse with its head stuck in our kitchen. We were all in shock and burst out laughing. We went outside to investigate and there was a very old man weakling overalls, tweed jacket, and smocking a pipe. The horse was hooked up to an old wagon. He asked us if we wanted to go for a little drive. My parents hesitated at first, but off we went. It ended up being one of my favourite childhood memories.

He told us storeis along the way, like the time he was pulled over in the horse and buggy and charged with drinking and driving. He fought the charge and drvoe his buggy all the way to the court house in Charlotte Town, he even made money on the way picking up bottles on the roadside. The highlight of the drive though was when he pulled up to the liquor store and parked the horse & buggy in the parking lot, leaving us to sit there while he went into the store. Everyone was smiling and talking a second look when they pulled up to the store and saw us sitting there. The funniest monet came when he said " I have to get home to mom, and make her some supper". He looked about 80. We wondered how old his mother was (ha ha!)

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This is a story I was told as a child. I never bothered to investigate it but I liked the romanticism of it.

My great-great grandfather on my Mother's side was a smuggler along the coast from Nova Scotia to Maine. Like a pirate, we always asked, picturing a swashbucking handsome hero. Apparently, he smuggled rum and tobacco and other goods 'un-named'. He was, so we were told, very successful at what he did and managed to amass a lot of money and a lot of land. Of course, the authorities stepped in and ended his illegal activities. He was arrested and although his lands weren't confiscated, his money was. His descendents didn't have enough money to maintain the land or pay the taxes and they weren't good at farming so most of the land was also confiscated by the authorities.

That is how our family lost its fortune. Although made from illegal activities, they were the 'innocent victims' of 'harsh' government regulations.

---

When I was a child, it was almost 20 years ago. I used to live with my grandpa, everyday morning, we got up early, then go to a restaurant to “drink tea”, that is one daily event between me and my grandpa.

One day, we went to the same restaurant as usual, and I had fun with other children in the restaurant beside a small manmade lake which added a few fish in it on that day. I was so curious about the fish that new in the lake, so I wanted to touch them, I got closer and closer to them, suddenly, a boy pushed me, and then I fell into the lake. I thought the lake was so deep that I can’t stand on the bottom, so I struggled and scream. My grandpa heard my voice, and he ran to me, and said, anki, the lake is not as deep as you think so, but I heard nothing and kept struggling. There was no choice, so my grandpa jumped into the lake, and helped me got out of the lake…

It’s the most impression story I have remembered in my childhood.

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People often ask me why I’m so religious. They ask me why I continue to visit a church that continues to rejects me. It is written in the bible after all that my ‘kind” is sinful. I am allegedly damned to hell when I die. But yet I’m a devout catholic. Every time I enter the church I get blatant stares, or people uncomfortably look away. Everyone knows the truth, but no one will say anything. They save the gossip for when I’m not around. A horrible feeling of loneliness and rejection in an otherwise sacred and spiritually fulfilling atmosphere.

I still remember the day the priest found out. I had been volunteering to direct a Christmas pageant that was to be performed the following Sunday. The priest invited me over for dinner that weekend, and said he’d like it if I brought my family as well. I gladly accepted his offer. That weekend, the priest heard a knock on his door. On his door step, he saw me, another man and two children; a boy and a girl. He asked if the man was my brother; I said no. He was my partner, Jamie, and the two children were from a previous marriage of his from which he maintained custody. The priest seemed shocked. A man who was normally very talkative now seemed unusually awkward. Jamie never helped much either. He had a strong passion against the Catholic church. He believed it was the sole cause of homophobia, and refused to ever step foot in a church. It was a wonder I managed to get him to even eat dinner with the priest.

After that day, the priest seemed to talk less with me. He avoided eye contact, and seemed to stutter during the rare occurrences where we did actually speak.

Jamie still asks me, “Why do you still visit an institution that claims we’re to be damned to hell?” I tell him that the bible is written by man, and it’s God I worship every Sunday. And I don’t believe God would damn anybody.


Once upon a time there was this young boy who had a dream to become a professional athlete. He was from the western part of Canada. This kid was multi-talented; he could play soccer, basketball and hockey at a high level of competition. All his family and friends knew this kid is special, but figured he could not make it professionally.

When he reached high school, his main focus was playing basketball and wanted to get a scholarship at one of the top notch universities in the United States, where basketball is big all over the world. He applied everywhere, but nobody would accept him or take him seriously, mainly because of the fact that he was Canadian and our country usually did not have the talent of athletes in the USA. But one day, he finally got accepted to a small university in California after all that trouble.

When he got there, nobody expected much of him, being a small Canadian born basketball player. So he worked hard everyday, putting extra hours in the gym, bouncing tennis balls rather than basketballs to work on his dribbling skills. Eventually his work started to payoff, as he stood out as the best player on his team, setting a few records at the school as well. Some people recognized that he had great game.

Finally, when it came down to trying to make it in the NBA, most people did not think he was good enough. This did not faze him because this happened to him before. He finally got drafted, but was not recognized as a very good player. The first few years in the league, he rarely got a lot of playing time and did not have very good numbers. So again he worked even harder than before, playing in the gym before practice and even staying after practice. He worked and worked and worked and eventually, things got better for him and people started to take him seriously. This lead to him being a high profile player and a two-time MVP of the league……I don’t think it’s hard to guess who this guy is.

Moral- Hard work will always pay-off, maybe not right away, but surely down the road.

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At first I didn’t know what story I was going to tell you because I am a person that has many stories to tell (some more legal then othersJ) that I didn’t know what one to tell you, but after a long thought process I have come up with the one that I think is the funniest thing in the last four years of my life.

Back in my grade 11 year of high school I was chosen to attend the Encounters With Canada program in Ottawa, while there we did various tours and other events. On our first day their during the afternoon we went for a walking tour of the capital region but we missed a few things that were on the to-do lists of our monitors so we decided that we would come back that evening to do those certain things. So when we came back we walked through one of the main parks near parliament, and before we went through it was mentioned that this was a popular spot for local “special women” to loom. As we went through I saw this pretty shady looking women (you have to keep in mind this was just around dusk!) and I said to the person next to me (who I ASSUMED was my friend that I had been walking with this entire time) hey look at that babe over there I think it’s a hooker getting ready to start her evening “drive-thru”, and to my unbeknownst surprise it was one of my monitors that was doing the tour. I was very relieved when I realized it was one of the younger ones so she laughed her ass off, and from that point on until it was over the two of us had an amazing insider joke between us!

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A few weeks ago my friend Dave and I decided it would be a good idea to go to St. FX to visit our friend Joe…well, Dave decided and gave me 15 minutes notice that we were going to X for the night. I think another factor in his decision was that there was supposed to be a rather large keg party going on that weekend.

After quickly packing up a few things I would need, beer and sandwiches mostly, Dave roared into my driveway with his 1988 Porsche and we were on our way.

The drive was mostly uneventful; we ate some sandwiches, talked about our plans for that night, and wondered what Joe would think when we showed up unannounced with plans to sleep on his floor.

When we arrived at X things quickly got into full swing, Joe was happy to see us and as it turns out there was a party on the floor of his residence that night. We met a few more people who lived in the same building (Lane Hall) and most of them were very friendly and surprisingly free with their alcohol, which struck me as odd. In high school if you brought beer to a party, you would have to carry it around with you all night or risk having it stolen (which it most certainly would be), yet these people were giving out free beer like it was going out of style.

Throughout the night, we traveled to several other residence halls, as well as the house party with the keg, which we had heard about earlier in the night. I vaguely remember getting thrown out of one residence because Dave had taken it upon himself to smoke cigarettes in the bathrooms, rather then step outside into the blistering cold night. Also during the night we had somehow come into possession of a 60 ounce bottle of vodka…I’m quite confident we paid a girl about 20 dollars for it at one of the parties…but I can’t be sure. In any case, we returned to Joe’s room at about 5:00 AM and went to sleep for a few hours.

Feeling in no mood for the greasy breakfast the school provided, we decided it would be prudent to get on the road early for our return home. The 2 hour drive turned into about a 5 hour one however when the Porsche broke down outside of St. Peters.

Dave and I spent 20 minutes trying to hitchhike into town to call CAA when finally a nice older woman picked us up. I was very surprised that we found a drive at all, as both of us looked like serial killers after our long night of partying. In any case, Dave finally got in touch with his mother as well as CAA and we were able to get the car towed. His mother drove all the way to St. Peters to pick us up. I’d say the trip was worth it though.

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Once their was a young boy named Jamie who was orphaned at a young age. He was sent to live with his grandmother who treated him like a slave. She made him eat scraps of food that fell on the floor and he had to sleep in the attic. He was allowed to go to school but he didn't have any friends. He wore second hand clothes that were very out of date and he was really skinny and frail. Every night before he went to sleep he would pray to God or anyone who would listen that he wanted to get away. One day Jamie decided he had had enough so he packed his bag of tattered clothes and ran away. He was wandering the streets cold and alone with no idea of where to go. All of a sudden a strange man came out of nowhere and offered the boy a home, job and a chance at an education. He decided it was better than dying on the streets or going back to his grandmothers. He arrived at his new home to find other children who were in similar situations as himself. They explained to Jamie that the mysterious man was a widowed millionaire who wanted to help homeless children because he had lost his own children. Jamie realized how lucky he was to have a home and he grew up happy and healthy with a family who loved him.

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I'm standing outside the building with a sign in my hand. Does a piece of cardboard with writing on it attached to a piece of wood count as a sign? I don't know, we'll call it a sign for lack of a better word. My hands are freezing and I begin to wonder why I didn't wear gloves. It's freezing. It's winter, afterall, it's supposed to be freezing. My ears are warm. I've worn a toque. A shocking burst of intelligence in a day of stupid decisions.

I glance around me. Side to side, front to back. I'm one of a small group, a minority. They all look like lost sheep. Sheep holding signs and standing around in the cold wondering what the hell they should do with themselves. I'm waiting for someone to let out a worried "Baaa...". The thought makes me smile. A woman standing next to me frowns so I stop smiling and look back at the building. This is the saddest protest I've ever attended. I haven't attended many. Noone's yelling or breaking things or making funny rhymes. I signed on for broken bones and billy bats, smashed windows and egging. Peaceful protests were boring.

I perk up when someone exits the building. He's dressed in a nice suit and tie, shiny shoes. He's wearing an expensive jacket and what look to be leather gloves. And a scarf. I want that scarf. My neck is cold. He looks at our sad group. The lost sheep. I think I hear a "Baaa...".

"What are you all doing here?" he asks. I can hear the laugh in his voice. Noone says anything. Sheep don't speak. I look around and wait for someone to say something. Nothing. That guy with the warm scarf and shiny shoes is talking again. I'm not listening. Cold and bored I rebel--the black sheep--and toss my sign over the crowd. It lands with a pathetic thump on the frozen grass. The whole group turns to look at me. Scared sheep, their eyes are wide.

I tug my hat down over my ears and mutter an obscenity under my breath. Then I turn away from the group and start walking home.

I never liked sheep.

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While my brother was away at college, he called me one day and told me a story about his friend’s sister, named Kimmy. Lee and his sister were sitting in the car waiting for their parents to come from the house. The car had been covered with ice and Lee thought it would be funny to roll down the window and say “Hey Kimmy watch this.” Lee smashed his head through the sheet of ice that covered where the window was. Kimmy was amazed when Lee rolled the window up and a new one appeared. I guess Lee got out of the car for a minute, and when he got back in Kimmy said “Lee look!” Kimmy hauled off and smashed her head into the window and the glass shattered. Lee freaked out because she had a huge gash in her head with glass stuck in it, but Kimmy reassured him it was okay and tried to roll a new window back up, except she had actually broken the window so pieces of glass fell everywhere.

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This story has been told around the diner table at my grandparents house many times. We visit my grandparents every staturday for lunch. my grandmother isn't always the best cook(we all seem to pop an antacid right before we pull in to their driveway for our weekly lucheon). My grandfather is 81 years old and is still as young as ever, just this winter he renovated their kitchen all on his own. there is nothing that my grandfather can not build. He is a sweet man and tells us lots of stories about the old farm. There is one story though that explains my grandfather's personality so well and we all seem to chuckle when we hear it.

Back when my grandfather was a younger man, going to the dentist was not something that was regulary done. My grandfather had a really bad tooth ache and could not get rid of it, so finally my granmother convinced him to go to the dentist. Now when my grqndfather was a child there was no such thing as freezing medication but the day he went to the dentist for his aching tooth it was a normal occurance to have freezing done. My grandfather did not know this. My grandfather is not a big man but he did work on a farm for over 20 years and was not the type to get scared easily. When he was sitting in the chair waitng for the tooth to be pulled out the dentist came over holding a long needle to freeze his mouth. My grandfather looked at the dentist and calmly said "just one moment" he took off the bib, got up from his chair and put on his hat and said " you have a nice day" and left the dentist office. He has not be to a dentist since.

This story has brought many laughs to our famillie's saturday luncheons. i love this story because my my grandfather gets just as big a kick out of it as everyone else.

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My story comes from my early childhood. I was about 4 or 5 years old I was at my aunt and uncle's house for my cousin's birthday. It was dark when we were leaving the house and straight ahead of the house, about 100 yards away on the hill, is an old barn. Being a young child with a wildly active imagination, I thought that the white boxes stacked in the corner of one of the windows looked very much like the A&W Root Beer Bear. So much so that I convinced myself it was the actual bear and he lived in their barn. Every time I left their house from that point on it was a dead sprint to the car so that he wouldn't be able to catch me. Of course, I was the youngest child in the family and every time before I left their house, my four older cousins would sing the song - the one that goes Ba doom, Ba doom Ba doom Ba doom doom. They still think they are funny and do it the odd time when I leave the house in the dark. I do not think they are funny and have proudly overcome my fear of the A&W Root Beer Bear. I can even eat at A&W now. If this is not a success story, then I don't know what is.